Finding True Love
This has been a very busy summer. As usual God’s call on my life has taken me to many youth conferences and camps. This morning (Friday) I spoke to the youth at Fort Bluff about the importance of finding the will of God for their life in the matter of future marriage. I emphasized the importance of maintaining purity, which enhances the aptitude for reading the spiritual radar for the right man or right woman.
Christchurch has been a haven for happily married people. I am blessed above all pastors with a church full of lovers! This afternoon we will be celebrating the life of Peggy Groenwold, who passed from this life into heaven just after 10:00 am, this past Wednesday. She and John had been married for forty-seven wonderful years. She will be sorely missed, but what a legacy she and John have left of true love. I am thinking of my mom, Mabel Diehl, Eloise Reaves, Jeanette Matthews, Roy Riley (to mention a few). All had great loves of a lifetime! With all my heart, I believe that God in His kindness grants the right man to the right woman. The Bible says, “Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it: if a man would give all the substance of his house for love, it would utterly be condemned” (Song of Solomon 7:7). The beautiful Song of Solomon is an inspired, poetic tribute to true love between the Savior and His bride but also quite literally between a man and a woman. In chapter three the Shulamite maiden longs for her one true love. In her quest that starts with a dream, we come to an understanding of how we find true love. Please notice the sequence of events:
I. The Longing
Song of Solomon 3:1 says, “By night on my bed I sought him whom my soul loveth: I sought him, but I found him not.” God places a longing in the heart of every person (with the exception of those specially gifted to remain unmarried) to be connected to that “one and only.” “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him” (Genesis 2:18). God has a helpmeet for you, in other words, just right for you. In the quiet, lonely hours of the night, the young lady has this insatiable desire to be wedded to the man God has intended for her. So she dreams, perhaps of the man whose heart is bigger than the sky, whose protection gives her comfort, whose budding industry reassures her, whose undying and constant love calms her. God will talk to us in a dream, if we only relax. We try to break down walls, when God is wanting to open doors. God brought Eve to Adam in the relaxed state of sleep and God is willing to bring you the love of your life if you will throw yourself “out of gear” and let the Lord take over the driving. “In a dream, in a vision of the night, when deep sleep falleth upon men, in slumberings upon the bed; Then He openeth the ears of men, and sealeth their instruction” (Job 33:15,16). In her dream she was in search of the exact one, she didn’t find him and with determination she begins:
II. The Looking
“Í will rise now, and go about the city in the streets, and in the broad ways I will seek him whom my soul loveth: I sought him but I found him not” (Song of Solomon 3:2). The Shulamite uses the expression, “Him whom my soul loveth.” This expression provides insight telling us where love begins, i.e. in the soul. Many people say they fall in love when actually they are only sensually aroused. It is a dangerous thing to confuse love with an intense desire to be physically gratified. Counterfeit lust cannot wait to get, true love can wait to give.
Biblical courtship is in search of the soul mate and will settle for nothing less. Before I met my wife, I was disappointed in my vain attempts of boy meets girl situations. I went two years without dating. From the first date until we became married,
I had the keen sense that she was the soul mate.
This is why talking is so important. Conversing pries the outside shell open, to see the real person. Soul love sees beyond the exterior and loves the person for who they are, not for some existential preconceived idea of who you think they are, clouded by glamour, glitz, and carnality.
III. The Law
“The watchmen that go about the city found me: to whom I said, Saw ye him whom my soul loveth?” (Song of Solomon 3:3). The watchmen represent the law of that day. In her dream the concerned watchmen pull her aside to discover her intent. The watchmen either knew where her beloved was and directed her to him or they observed this was no woman of the night; she was a lovesick young lady on the mission to find her one great love and respectfully gave her leave to continue her search. The Shulamite solicited the law to help her. In the carnal search for love, the law is thrown to the wind. I am amazed and shocked that many a couple will attempt to enjoy the benefits of marriage privilege, but without the moral obligation of honoring God’s Law in the matter. The obedient child of God will say with the Psalmist, “O how love I thy law! It is my meditation all the day” (Psalm 119:97). “Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband” (I Corinthians 7:2). If moral rules are broken, it is a good sign that you are traversing a journey without God’s guidance. The Bible declares, “Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love” (I John 4:7,8). Meditating upon the two previous verses informs us that God owns love and furthermore, “God is love.” To abdicate God’s way and in violation of God’s word, true love is denied in the quest. The law is our schoolmaster to bring us to Christ (Galatians 3:24), which births us into His freedom. In much the same way, the rules are not intended to confine us but to liberate us into full aura of God’s love.
IV. The Link
“It was but a little that I passed from them, but I found him whom my soul loveth: I held him, and would not let him go, until I had brought him into my mother’s house, and into the chamber of her that conceived me” (Song of Solomon 3:4). In God’s way of true love finding, parents are not ignored, but a vital part of the decision process. The young lady links her future mate with her own past, present and future. She brings the one great love under the protection of her parent’s blessing. “Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother…” (Proverbs 23:22).
“I charge you, O ye daughters of Jerusalem, by the roes, and by the hinds of the field, that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, till he please” (Song of Solomon 3:5). Yesterday I had the privilege of performing the marriage ceremony for two kids reared up in Christchurch. In many ways, this couple is a prime example I desire for all our youth. They knew each other for ten years. Their school kid’s crush developed into something much bigger than their ability to comprehend and apprehend. After a time of doubt, the clouds rolled away and midway through their college years they discovered the love God had intended since the foundation of the world. They were obedient and did not stir up the love until it was time. Andrew and Rachel’s time has come and on this their first day of marriage, I give praise to a merciful God who has granted them something all the fairy tales and novels in this world cannot give…true love!
- Pastor Pope -